Who’s that Trip Trapping Over My Bridge?

Remember the evil troll under the bridge in Three Billy Goats Gruff?

It was always hungry… and angry… and evil.

The thought of such a creature, one that waited under the bridge, pouncing on passersby, terrifying them and then mercilessly devouring them: It freaked me out.

The thought haunted me as a child. I was terrified even contemplating that a hideous monster was living and lurking in the shadows.

Beneath the bridge.
Inside the drain.
Under the stairs.

This waiting and lurking monster could spring out of nowhere, any time you went past.

It would seize your leg or grab your arm—and with one mighty yank, it would drag you into darkness to feast. No matter how much you begged it would not let you go. You would die a slow painful death as it ate you.

Even now those ghastly memories still have the power to give me goose bumps (if you could see me as I write this you would see them on my arms).

Isn’t it lucky monsters like evil trolls don’t exist?! No one could possibly believe that childhood monsters could actually appear in our adult years: except for maybe on the big screen. Fairy tales and magic don’t really exist, it’s all pretend. You can sleep soundly at night knowing it is ALL made up.

Except…

What if I told you the monsters ARE real?

These days the monsters are much smarter.

Instead of pacing under the bridge waiting for the next victim to cross, they actively seek you out and stalk you, but you won’t be able to identify them. These evil, menacing and destructive trolls hide behind their monitors, and appear online. They trawl your website and monitor your social media activity, but are able to hide in a web of anonymity.

And from behind their monitors, they sit, watching, trawling and stalking, waiting for the right opportunity to strike. It’s only a matter of time, but when they pounce, they will use all their mendacity and vindictiveness to overpower you, take you down, and fill you with pain before they mercilessly devour you.

Does that sound scary?

Well, it is to me—because I have my very own troll. I’ll let you in on a little “secret”: I have not lived a perfect life. I’ve shared freely my experiences with depression and drug use online, which the troll can’t twist and use against me—it’s powerless there. The anonymous emails aren’t stopping my progress, how frustrating for the troll.

So what’s a spiteful troll to do?

Lie.
Manipulate.
Deceive.

The troll will wait for a chance to demean you publicly, but they are clever in how they do it. They hide in the shadows of anonymity and see what trouble they can cause. They mince words and sprinkle them with untruths to see if they can hurt you that way.

When it happened to me, I was actually quite uncomfortable to read what was written. I was uncomfortable as it was a deliberate lie, and now this person had leveled up. Now it was beyond unsigned and anonymous emails: they had gone public with their vitriol.

I considered how to respond: does engaging with the troll make them feel better, like they have won because you have spoken back?

I decided to throw down the gauntlet. I challenged them to tell me their name, and to stop hiding under their bridge—be seen out in the light and fight like a real monster. But the cowardly troll still hasn’t stepped out.

See, a troll will only strike at a victim it thinks can’t fight back. It’s actually a weak monster, using cheap intimidation tactics and hiding in the shadows. It’s not a real monster, in fact it’s even despised by other monsters because the troll doesn’t fight—it relies upon its ugliness to terrorise its victims.

You may be wondering why I am sharing this. What if Trolly McTrollypants will come back to take more shots?

Its time to take a stand

The bullying has to stop.

I have been bullied many times in my life and I have taken it lying down. I’ve been left fragile, vulnerable and filled with self-doubt.

Now I say “NO MORE!”

I refuse to be shut down. I am moving forward and progressing. And I am winning. The anonymous emails aren’t stopping my progress—how frustrating it must be for the cowardly troll!

Where I once thought my Great Work was behind me; I now see that it may have just been a prelude for what is yet to come.

This troll is aiming to stop me from reaching my place of artistry, and embracing my identity. I have suffered and succumbed to its terrorism too many times in the past.

“NO MORE!”

So Trolly McTrollypants, this is my message to you:

“Love me or hate me, I now realise what you feel has has nothing to do with what I am here to achieve. You can think my work has no value, or you can embrace it and support me: the choice is yours. After years of fearing going over the bridge, I will trip trap across the dammed bridge, how I choose and you will not stop me.

Keep posting troll. You are obviously obsessed with me, but not good enough to reach me. You inspire me to keep pushing forward, to keep looking within, and to keep fighting. No matter what you do—I win.”

When the trolls come forward and you hesitate to cross the bridge:

Remember who you are.

Remember why you are here.

Embrace your great work and hold it close to you.

Your work is art, let it speak for you.

Never let the trolls win.