There is a demon – we all face him. We all live with him in varying degrees and ways.
He is the demon of resistance.
The one who desperately holds you back from accomplishing the things you were put on this planet to accomplish by whispering lies designed to keep you small.
When it comes to sales, that Demon looms large in all his terrifying glory.
“If I call this person, I’ll be bothering them, I’d better not do it!”
“Calling people is pushy and wrong – I’m just going to send emails.”
“I don’t have to make calls – I’m going to hide behind the 50-step funnel of doom and maybe one day someone will give me money!”
If you’re currently saying any of the above to yourself, you need to recognise the demon.
We see this played out daily on our sales floor. Because people are themselves resistant to making sales, they become angry when one of my team calls to help them.
And understand – this is where our ‘sales’ process differs to most – our team call to help first and foremost. We don’t play this ‘Ask 5 questions about the client and then pitch your product’ game – because that’s pointless and unhelpful.
If we can’t show you MASSIVE value on the phone and get you MASSIVE breakthroughs in your business, then you shouldn’t buy from us. That’s always 100% our rule. In fact, our ‘sales’ process is more like a disqualification process – if we can’t help you, we’ll get off the phone. If you don’t want our help, we’ll get off the phone. If you don’t agree with the strategies we’re laying down – the exact same ones that have made our clients literally millions of dollars – we’ll get off the phone.
I think a lot of people miss that when they’re attempting to pitch their stuff … why would anyone buy from you if you don’t get them a whole bunch of MASSIVE breakthroughs on the call? (Spoiler alert: if the person on the other end of the phone is agreeing with you the whole time, you’re NOT getting breakthroughs. And that’s probably where your sale is falling down)
So when people freak out that a member of my sales team (all of whom, by the way, have built 7 figure annual revenue businesses themselves – these guys are legit) has called them, I hear MASSIVE sales resistance.
I hear the voice of the demon.
When they get angry and lash out – accuse my guys of being “too pushy” (normally because my guys refuse to pitch them, which is odd, but there you go), or of being NLP Manipulators (I’m on record as being staunchly against NLP as a sales technique – it’s completely out of integrity and you will NEVER see or hear us using it) – then I forgive them.
Because I understand that what it’s not them – it’s that demon in their ear and on their back.
Here’s the thing.
You can’t beat that demon by giving into him.
I know, I know – there’s a thousand coaches out there who are selling all the reason you don’t have to make sales. They’re promising you if you just pay them, they’ll teach you how to make all of the monies on the internets and never have to talk to a person.
And I get – it’s comforting to buy a lie.
And I know – that THIS is the reason I see so many amazing, strong entrepreneurs with so much value to add, disappear … why I get the daily LinkedIn notifications about how they’ve gone back to a day job.
But they don’t call me the High Priestess of Hard Truths for nothing.
I’ll be honest, even when it hurts my bottom line.
And the honest truth is this:
Business is sales.
Being an entrepreneur is just a glorified way of calling yourself a salesperson.
Whether you’re selling clients, selling employees on your vision, selling VC on funding – your job, as an entrepreneur and a business owner, is and always will be sales first.
When you treat sales people on the phone with suspicion and anger rather than with kindness (yes, I even treat overseas call centre guys with kindness – because like everyone else, they’re just trying to feed their family. I don’t approve of what they do, I don’t like the bad name it gives those of us who do sales well – but I have empathy for what it must be like to work so hard for so little money, living with the constant fear of whether you’ll be able to keep a roof over your children’s head) – you allow the demon to win.
When you stop yourself from getting on the phone, adding value and asking for the order – you allow the demon to win.
When you prioritise your fear over helping people and becoming a stronger person – you allow the demon to win.
I know it’s scary.
Everything is at the start.
Sales, especially so – because sales is just people, and that’s the number one thing that petrifies us all. We’re hard wired to crave the love of the people around us – ostracism is a fate worse than death, to most people. We’re scared that by calling people and holding them accountable that they’ll reject and hate us.
And I don’t just mean in business.
Most people lead quiet, tepid lives.
They connect with others on the surface, they avoid going deep or having relationships that are challenging or confronting. They run from anything that gets deep enough where other people might see who they truly are …
Which is sad, because all of this in their heads.
And if they realised that everyone is walking around with the same fear – desperately craving deep connections, but also scared of them and what they mean – perhaps it would help them find the courage they’ve buried.
I’m not joking when I say sales is the best personal development program you’ll ever do.
Because to sell, you have to be truly vulnerable.
You have to take the risk of going first.
You have to risk being the one who is enthusiastic and loving – even if the person you’re talking to thinks you’re a “psycho” for doing it.
You have to risk demonstrating unconditional love – even if the person you’re talking to rejects it or thinks you’re being manipulative.
You have to wear your heart on your face and be prepared for the rejection that comes with that.
Because you will be rejected.
And there are those who will hate and despise you for your unconditional love – and you need to be the person who is big enough to continue to love them anyway.
When my ex-husband cheated on me, I remember having this one day where I was SO angry and SO hurt and SO wanted to take it all out on anyone and everyone around me. But I gave myself this big, long talk that went a little something like,
“You know Leela, you can be that chick – the one who is so hurt by the world that she becomes hard and angry and never lets anyone in. But who wins if you do that? Leela – you are strong. Whatever else they have to say about you – that’s one thing they’ve never been able to argue. And you know what real strength is? Risking being hurt again and again – knowing you WILL be hurt again and again – and doing it anyway, because you know you can survive anything they throw at you.”
Further, if you can learn that the things they throw at you aren’t a reflection of you, but of their own pain and desperation … then you can accept those things from them without taking it on or feeling pain. You can have empathy and exhibit that – while maintaining a firm boundary that says – your reaction to my love is not a rejection of me, but a rejection of self-love.
And how can you be anything other than loving of someone who is so hurt that they can’t even love themselves?
You can’t make someone face the demon – even when you have. Even when you understand the hell they’re trapped in and the liberation that’s on the other side.
All you can do is show up – lead. Be the example. Love them.
If they reject that – if they’re not ready – you can let them go.
Because your fight isn’t with their demon.
It’s always – ALWAYS – with your own.
Every day when he rears his head – to stop you from getting on the phone, to stop you from making money, to stop you from having true and deep relationships with the people around you, to stop you from being truly open and loving.
We all deal with him. And he never goes away. When you think you have him under control, he’ll find more insidious ways to come at you.
He will leach from you the deep, loving and joyful relationships you deserve.
He will leach from you the achievements and excellence you were born for.
He will leach from you all that is good – your light, your legacy.
This is the battle that determines whether you achieve your goals.
Whether you leave your legacy.
Whether you step into your destiny.
This is the battle for your life.
And in it, there can be no giving of ground. No half-measures. Nothing but complete and utter dedication to the cause.
This is what excellence looks like.
This is what courage looks like.
This is what being who you were meant to be looks like.
It’s the hardest thing you’ll ever do.
And the most rewarding.